I have faced many significant personal and professional setbacks in my life, and usually separate. Unfortunately, a broken partnership is a difficult setback I have experienced on more than one occasion, which affects me personally and professionally.
When you and a business partner decide to go separate, it negatively affects your personal and professional world. I found that partnering with individuals I genuinely like and respect as people has always been a good choice – although this may be uncommon for others. This is what makes losing a partner a personal challenge. On more than one occasion and in more than one country, I have, in fact, chosen the wrong business partnership. This mistake led to financial struggles, poor management, and inadequate leadership and compliance processes.
Questions of contribution, impact, and teamwork were constant issues until they reached the point of no return. Unfortunately, once you reach that point, there really is no going back. We had a golden opportunity to build something special—instead, everything unraveled, and we had to make tough business decisions to right the ship.
For a time, I grappled with the question: how could someone who was both a friend and a partner fail so dramatically? How did I end up choosing the wrong partner? This was a tough period for me. I was confused, frustrated, and angry. Initially, I blamed my soon-to-be ex-partner, thinking, “If they had only managed things better and kept their promises, none of this would have happened. It’s their fault.”
But eventually, I had to confront the truth. I realized that to move forward, I needed to learn from this experience. Though it was incredibly difficult and humbling, I am now grateful for this period in my life. The lessons I learned were critical and life-changing, and I’m convinced that without this failure, I wouldn’t be where I am today.
However, not every failure ends positively. Some people suffer setbacks and never recover. But I believe it doesn’t have to be this way. It all depends on how you process the failure. To succeed, you must learn to handle failure effectively.
This is why I emphasize that business owners understand the potential pitfalls of mixing personal relationships with business. The stress and differing beliefs can lead to conflicts. There's a saying: “Trust is nothing without verification.” This approach forces you to evaluate not just the individual but also what went right and what went wrong, helping you extract the lessons—however painful—that will improve your chances of success in the future.
Whether you’re a small business owner trying to make sense of past setbacks or someone looking to move on from painful events and use them as catalysts for a better future, there are six key components to turning failure into an advantage:
Acknowledge the Failure This is where it all begins. Failure is natural when striving for big results. The real issue arises when you fail and refuse to acknowledge it. Several years ago, I had an employee who was underperforming. The issue wasn’t just the lack of results but his refusal to admit there was a problem. His constant defensiveness only confirmed our doubts about his understanding of the situation. Consequently, we had no choice but to let him go. Acknowledging failure is the first step to overcoming it and turning it into something positive.
Take Full Responsibility Blaming others for your failure won’t get you anywhere. As long as responsibility is external, you remain a victim because you can’t control others—only yourself. By taking full responsibility, you regain control. You’ll see that you could have handled things differently, opening the door to new possibilities and better outcomes in the future. This shift in perspective starts with acknowledging and owning the failure.
Mourn the Failure Sometimes, failures come with real and serious losses, including collateral damage and harm to others. It’s okay to feel sad and take time to recover. When I faced my financial setback, I mourned deeply for weeks. This thorough grieving process was crucial to my eventual recovery. Properly dealing with the loss helped me bounce back more quickly.
Learn from the Experience Failure can be redemptive if you extract lessons from it. It doesn’t have to be career-ending; if you fully process the experience, it can be career-building. Pain can be a powerful teacher. As the saying goes, “What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger”—but only if we learn from it. Instead of asking, “What went wrong?” which often leads to blame, ask, “What was missing?” This approach fosters learning and opens up new possibilities.
Change Your Behavior Philosopher and poet George Santayana once said, “Those who cannot learn from history are doomed to repeat it.” Learning from failure is meaningless unless it leads to behavioral change. If we continue the same actions that led to the failure, we will likely experience more of it. We must be willing to change, and it starts with us.
Enter Wholeheartedly into the Next Project Don’t let failure hold you back from your next venture. If you fall off the horse, get back on immediately. Waiting too long might prevent you from getting back on at all. Instead, leave the past behind and move forward with renewed vigor.
You can’t control others; you can only control yourself. Embrace responsibility for your mistakes and use them as opportunities for growth. Failure is a natural part of tackling significant goals.
When you fail, it means you’re taking action and striving for big things. The key is to learn from these failures and let them plant the seeds for your future success.
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